In my 25 years as a therapist, I’ve worked with countless couples facing a broad spectrum of challenges. Yet, despite the diversity between them in age, occupation, or origin, I’m amazed at the similarities in the patterns and pitfalls that couples fall into. When two people walk into my office and start discussing their relationship, the first thing I tell them is to focus on empowering yourself. The only person you can change is you. If both parties accept this, real change is possible in the relationship. With this theme of self-empowerment in mind, I offer you six suggestions on how you can be your own couple’s therapist.